Why is it...

Why is it that anytime you get a hold of extra money your vehicle knows and takes it away from you?


Tawk amongst yourselves.... I'm overclempt.

A Typical day at the office

Breathe.
Take a sip of your Fresca.
Stack those papers. Can't let them be unkempt.
OCD maybe?
Check the time.
Do you have voicemail?
E-mail?
Did you remember to do that?
Do that.
Write it down.
Don't forget.
Shit. You forgot.
Breathe.
look at to do list.
Eat a cracker.
Feel guilty for eating a cracker because you're stressed.
Not because you're hungry.
Stomach Growls.
Phone rings.
Please sign this.
Turn this into accounting.
Take a sip of your Fresca.
Make copies of this.
How many copies?
Schedule.
Open the document.
Fuck up.
Breathe.
Is my fly down?
Button undone?
Anything in my teeth?
No.
Turn on the fan. It's hot in here.
Are you having a hot flash?
No. You're in your 20s.
Make another to do list. Revised.
Slouch in your chair.
Look at your messy desk.
Breathe.
Take a sip of Fresca.

"The story you are about to hear is true. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent."

A real conversation

Dan: So did you hear about the interesting phone call that Caroline had?

Chubby: No, what was that?

Dan: She got a call from a Chinese vendor looking to sell food at the Powwow. Guess they didn't know that only people from tribes can sell food or anything for that matter at the Powwow.

Chubby: Guess it's not a Kung Pao Wow, then.

Dan: (blank stare)

Chubby: (giggle)

Dan: ok I'm leaving now. (walks away)

Believe it or not it's just me

Hello world,
It's just me. I'm sorry I've been so out of touch lately. See I've been on another planet and forgot to call or write and there've been lots of things keeping me from visiting occasionally. How's life? I've been keeping pretty busy myself. Alternate realities are interesting, but I think that I'd like to get away for a while and come back to the real world. Unfortunately I can't quite seem to get back there. I don't have ruby slippers to click together, you see. I've got to find a hot air balloon or something to help me get back. It'll be a long road (or big sky, depending on my mode of transportation) but I'll be back someday. Then I'll have to see all the sights that I've missed.